I hate the iPhone

It's not even out yet (unless you're special) and I've never seen one in real life, but damn, do I ever hate the iPhone.

To be more precise it's not the actual gadget I hate as much as all the exaggerated hype and media hoopla surrounding it. For goodness sake people! It's a friggin' cellphone! It's not some magical device that will bring peace, stability and prosperity to the Galaxy.

Goddamnit, there are actually people camping outside of the Apple Store on 5th Avenue in New York already, just to be the first to get one. I'm sorry, but that's simply retarded.

Every damn tech news site I read is completely drowning in iPhone-spam (i.e. repetitive articles about how awesome it will be) and I'm just sick of it. On top of it all now that's it's just a couple of days until release the reviews are starting to pop up. I wanna puke.

But it's not just the hype that gets on my nerves, it's also the fact that I don't see what is really that special about the iPhone. Sure, it's most certainly a nice gadget, Apple's stuff usually is one way or another, but it's not that great. I mean, calm down people.

Just by reading not much more than the specs on Apple's website I quickly find the following serious flaws:

• It's just a GSM-phone, i.e. no 3G. That sucks.
• No videocamera, and that means no videochat. This from the computer manufacturer with the largest install base of webcams of all. Suck-o-rama.
• It can't send MMS-messages. Come fucking on! Can you say "medieval technology"?
• The camera is just 2 megapixels. Hardly impressive.
• No support for other video-formats than MOV and MP4. That means no DivX/XviD, which means it's hardly an ideal video playing device. More suckage.
• You can't use songs as ringtones. Wow, that's really fresh for a cellphone released in 2007.
• No removable battery. Are you kidding me?
• Non-expandable storage space. No memory-cards, nothing. Oh man, more suckage.
  
• Apple decides what provider you can use, not you. Suckfest deluxe.
• And finally, taking into account all of the above, it is way too expensive.
• Being a programmer myself I find the lack of an API for the iPhone very disturbing. Sure, Steve says it's all gonna be webapps run from within the phones browser, but no matter how awesome the web2.0 and AJAX revolution is there are still a shitload of things that simply can't be done with webapps. So yes, a real API would be nice.

That said, will someone please give me one real valid reason why this should be seen as such a revolutionary and a must-have item? Yes, I've seen the demo-movie on Apple's website and I know all about the snazzy touch-screen and its glorious sexiness. But hey, the fact that Apple make great user interfaces shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone and still, no matter how awesome the GUI is, it doesn't make up for the lack of features.

Or are you gonna spend the time you would sending MMS-messages to your friends flipping windows about and pinching stuff on the screen instead? And instead of videochatting with your peeps, maybe you can watch a video and gasp in awe when the movie pivots automatically as you rotate the device? Wow dude, that's real productive and worthwhile.

There is basically nothing that the iPhone does that my Nokia N80IE can't do, or at least nothing really significant, and it does everything noted above that the iPhone doesn't. In comparison the new wonder from Apple is a technological cripple. My cellphone (or any other phone out there) is however not enjoying the most tremendous tidal wave of hype ever like the iPhone is.

So for $499 I could buy a phone that compared to my current cellphone more or less sucks but has the power to make all Apple-fanboys wet themselves in awe? No thanks.

And please stop yapping about it. Really. STOP.